LSSL 5385: Book 5

Lily and Dunkin

By Donna Gephart

Gephart, D. (2016). Lily and Dunkin. NY: Delacorte Press.

For all of his life Timothy McGrother has believed he was born in the wrong. From a very young age he liked to wear dresses, play with dolls, and paint his nails. He identifies as a girl and wishes to be called Lily. His mom and older sister, Sarah, are very supportive of his transformation but his father has a toughen time coming to terms with it. It’s nearing the end of summer break and he’s ready to start making outward changes. He comes out in a dress to help his father unload groceries and sees a boy listening to music while walking down the street. The boy looks so happy that he waves at him. The boy is Norbert Dorfman who just moved from New Jersey with his mother to live with his bubbie. Norbert is dealing with bipolar disorder, which his father had as well. They become friends before school starts and feel comfortable and at ease in each other’s company. Norbert confides in Lily that he doesn’t really care for his name and she gives him the nickname Dunkin.

When school starts though things begin to change. Dunkin’s heights gains the attention of the Neanderthals and they bring him into their circle. At his previous school, Dunkin was more of an outcast and jumps at the chance to fit in with a group. They ask him if he plays basketball, and he immediately lies to be accepted by them. Meanwhile the Neanderthals are the ones who give Lily the most trouble. They are bullies who abuse her emotionally and physically. Although Dunkin witnesses them bullying Lily in the hallways, he does nothing to stop it out of fear of rejection. Dunkin works hard to learn the concept of basketball and with the help of his bubbie makes the team. He feels that when he takes his medicine it drains him and he doesn’t have as much energy to run and play like the other boys. As a result, he doesn’t think that he needs to be consistently taking his medication, and he starts to suffer on and off the court. During this time, Lily wants to stop changes from occurring in her body and asks her parents for permission to take hormone blockers. Lily’s father is against the idea and her mother has to have several discussions with him before he will agree to go see a therapist with them. After their meeting with the therapist he has a change of heart and Lily starts to receive the hormone blockers.

At a basketball game, Dunkin spirals out of control and is hospitalized for several days to get him the help he needs. While he’s in the hospital he finally comes to terms with the fact that his father gone and is able to start to grief his death. Lily and Dunkin had talked about the dance previously and of his goals in the hospital was to get well enough to attend. Lily is taking a big step at the dance and going fully dressed as a girl. She knows Dunkin recently got released from the hospital and hopes that he will be there. Dunkin shows up to the dance and they have a good time. At the dance Dunkin gets permission to start calling her by Lily. The best surprise is that her dad shows up to the dance to pick her up with one of his shirts proclaiming “I love my daughter.” On the car ride home her father finally shares with Lily what the therapist said that finally changed his mind and allowed him to start accepting Lily for who she is. With the support of both their families Dunkin and Lily were able to become who they were meant to be.

Donna Gephart was inspired to write Lily’s story after viewing a short film titled I am Girl by Susan Koenen. She knew that she wanted to write about this topic but needed to gain a better understanding and conduct thorough research. Her inspiration for Dunkin’s story comes from her own son, Andrew, who has bipolar disorder that she promised she would write about it someday. Gephart wrote in a way in which her main characters were relatable for young adults, and showed supportive family, friends, doctors, and therapists. Children might not always have the best home life, but hopefully with Lily and Dunkin they realize that they shouldn’t be afraid to reach out and talk to people. This is a great book for adults to read to gain a better understanding of transgender and how they struggle with fitting in and discovering who they really are. Also, after reading this book we may be able to see the signs of bipolar disorder or if student is wanting to transition, and be able to provide them with support. For students, Lily and Dunkin teaches acceptance and perseverance, and could be beneficial if they confused and struggling.

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